Welcome to UNKNOWN NEWS "News that's not known, or not known enough."
Helen & Harry Highwater's cranky weblog of news and opinion.
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Unknown News is more fun and more informative with your participation, so please don't be shy. Consider yourself invited to speak your mind -- our email address is newsuneed at yahoo.com.

We're especially interested in hearing and considering different perspectives. All we ask is that you conduct yourself sanely and civilly.

Please don't send attachments or other crap we don't want. To get past our filters, please send only plain, uncoded text.

Our website is obviously a labor of love. We give it virtually all our spare time, and work our asses off tryting to make Unknown News a site worth visiting. But our time is limited, so we especially appreciate folks who read these guidelines.

With that introduction out of the way, here are our guidelines, and here's what you might need to know about the basics of journalism, bylines, chitchat, copyright, disorganization, feedback, hate, hidden URLs, how many is too many, investigative journalism, language, length limits, quality and quantity, reality, rewrites and change-of-hearts, sites we won't link to, and wingnuts.

News guidelines

1. Our beat is 'unknown news' -- news from credible sources that hasn't received the attention it deserves. We're not interested in the same news that's being covered everywhere else.
With only rare exceptions, the topics we're interested in do not include Area 51, Bilderbergers, the Council on Foreign Relations, details you don't really understand about the World Trade Center's collapse, eyeballs inside pyramids, flying saucers, "Holocaust revisionism," Illuminati, Rothchilds, Rockefellers, Skull & Bones phobia, space aliens who walk among us, technologies allegedly suppressed for decades or generations, Trilateralists, or your theories about who killed JFK.
2. We do not link to 'news' from nutball sites. Our credibility is on the line: Every news link must trace back to a mainstream professional journalistic site or to an alternative source or reporter we (Helen & Harry) trust entirely. Picture us sighing as we add: Art Bell, Tom Flocco, David Icke, Alex Jones, Lyndon LaRouche, Wayne Madsen, Al Martin, Sherman Skolnick, Edgar Steele, and your brother-in-law are not what we consider "reliable sources."

3. "If it bleeds it leads" is the media's mantra. We have a different perspective: Personal tragedies are rarely news beyond the victim's friends and family.

4. Other 'news' that isn't news includes poll results, news conferences, politicians making speeches, talking heads talking, backstage political squabbles, announcements of government statistics, et cetera, ad nauseum. Unless there's something truly surprising in there somewhere, chances are we don't give a damn about such stuff.

5. Please look at Unknown News once in a while. Seriously. It makes our heads shake side-to-side, but most of the news-link suggestions we receive are suggesting links we've already linked to.

6. We only include material that really grabs our attention. And you're much more likely to get our attention if, instead of just sending a link, you tell us what you think of the news behind the link. Also, we'll tend to take your suggestions more seriously if you send one or two or even 3-4 link suggestions, instead of twenty, thirty, or 150 at once. Cut through the crap: That's what we love, what we need, and what we like best.

7. We cannot right your individual wrongs, or lead a crusade to deliver you from injustice. Not a week goes by that we don't hear a sad story from someone who's been treated unfairly by his/her boss, local police, City Hall, or some governmental agency, and these people seem to expect us to gallantly take on their causes. People send us their personnel files, court documents, fat files filled with documentation of their every gripes -- it's really amazing what some folks will send to strangers.
Well, we're rooting for you, but let's get real: This website is published by two people who work for a living, and we put virtually all our spare time into the website and other political activism. We're not your frickin' knights in shining armor, OK? We can nudge you in the right direction, toward the kind of activists who might be able to help you (hint: they're probably listed on our reference page). And if that doesn't work, we can offer a tiny sliver of publicity for your plight -- IF we think your story has merit and IF you do the work of writing it up in a coherent "letter to the editor" format.
8. Many media websites let readers "send an article (or an "e-postcard") to a friend." Please don't -- we don't want to be on newspapers' spam lists, and anyway, many of these sites send their articles as attachments or with encoding ... so they get filtered into the trash.

9. We welcome press releases, but we don't welcome wastes of our time. And while we don't appreciate the thought, we don't want to receive a junk e-mail every time you update your website. So when we receive a press release or other announcement that doesn't interest us, future emails from the same source will be filtered straight into the trash. (We seem to receive fewer and fewer press releases...)

10. News from months or years ago is rarely of interest, unless a rerun would shed light on some aspect of more current events.

Also, please note: Because we're a weblog of outside-the-mainstream political opinion, we usually edit out last names, email addresses, or anything else that would tend to uniquely identify writers when we publish articles, comments, or incoming emails (if we slip up, please let us know). But if your email is unambiguously intended only to annoy, insult, or threaten us, we'll publish all the details, and leave it on-line forever.


Commentary guidelines

1. We publish incoming emails that, in our opinion, add to the dialogue. That means, primarily, emails responding to something that's appeared on Unknown News, or emails about topics that would interest us and our readers.
With only rare exceptions, the topics we're interested in do not include Area 51, Bilderbergers, the Council on Foreign Relations, details you don't really understand about the World Trade Center's collapse, eyeballs inside pyramids, flying saucers, "Holocaust revisionism," Illuminati, Rothchilds, Rockefellers, Skull & Bones phobia, space aliens who walk among us, technologies allegedly suppressed for decades or generations, Trilateralists, or your theories about who killed JFK.

Even more important than your topic, though, is the length of what you've written. If you send twenty words about JFK's assassination we might publish it, but if you send hundreds and hundreds of words, or a 15,000-word essay titled "Part One," the answer will almost certainly be NO, even if the topic is something we might care deeply about. Please bear in mind that your readers (beginning with me) have to get to work on time, so keep it brief, and get to the point.

What we will or won't publish is somewhat subjective, but if you're trying to meaningfully and not-too-longwindedly discuss something tangibly related to our general topics of freedom and/or current events, we'll almost certainly publish your comments.
2. It's rather important that you let us know what the hell you're talking about. Feel free to respond to anything we've published, recently or years ago, but we've published thousands of pages, so please please please please PLEASE cite the URL, or at least summarize what was reported or said.
To help understand why this is a problem, here's a common conversation:

READER: You're utterly wrong about Dwight Eisenhower ...

UNKNEWS: Huh? We haven't published or linked to any recent articles about Eisenhower. Please send the URL of the page you're responding to, so we'll know what you're talking about ...

READER: What's an URL?

UNKNEWS: It's a web address, that long string of characters near the top of the screen in most browsers. Our URLs all start with http://www.unknownnews ...

READER: You don't know your own web address?

Oy. We're sorry, dear reader, but if you don't include an URL and/or we can't quickly figure out what you're responding to, we have to hit the delete button and move along.

Similarly, if we're chatting with you by email, please don't "tidy up" your email by deleting our earlier comments. We're old, none too bright, and we receive hundreds of emails daily. If you remove everything that might remind us of the previous conversation, we just plain won't remember what you're talking about.
3. Our website is not a frickin' bulletin board, and it's not a place where you can publish your weblog, free ads, daily list of links, or idiosyncratic sermonettes. We won't publish:
• forwarded emails

• emails addressed to someone else

• press releases, petitions, mass mailings, etc.

• advertising disguised as dialogue (believe me, we can tell)

• entire articles or lengthy excerpts you've cut-and-pasted from elsewhere

• lunatic emails or material that's wildly off-topic (unless it makes us laugh)

• "Johnny One-Note" stuff
(serialized emails reiterating the same points over and over again)

• comments that amount to endorsements of the status quo
(hint: the status quo isn't working)

• comments that are utterly obvious, like "What an ass" or "This President is an idiot," without any further comment.

• today's amusing anecdote that's already in everyone's email in-box and on-line at 171 websites

• anything with more than perhaps 8-10 links (few or no readers will follow your 79-link list, and checking and coding so many links takes time we don't have)

• long and/or rambling commentary unrelated to anything on this site (e.g., your lengthy opinions about the Vice President's wife's new dress, or elaborate theories about who really killed JFK or engineered 9/11)

• anything else, if we don't see your point, or if we don't see what it adds to the dialogue ("conversation between two or more persons").
4. We reserve the right to edit for clarity, length, or privacy concerns. We strongly recommend you proofread and spellcheck your email (because we probably won't). No rewrites, please, and no "change of heart" requests. Don't ask ME to fix YOUR mistakes after you've sent something in -- it's a pain in the ass and a waste of my time. Fix your own damned mistakes, please, by simply reading what you've written, and sending it when you're done writing it, not before.

5. We welcome and encourage disagreement, especially from people who think we're wrong and want to explain why and how. But you're in our apartment, not in a bar, so we expect you to act like a civilized human being. If you can't chat cordially, you risk having your email deleted or mocked as our patience evaporates.
We also recognize, sadly, that many people are too stubborn or simply too stupid to discuss political issues cordially. Our standards aren't particularly high, but we utterly, absolutely, and wholeheartedly reserve the right to put troublesome types out of our misery.
We won't tolerate hecklers, dim bulbs, cranks, kooks, or people who just waste our time.
If your comments amount to nothing but "Fuck you," we might delete and permanently block your emails instantly, or we might (if we're in a playful mood) try to coax something coherent out of unreasonable emailers. But even if we try, we won't try for long. Three strikes you’re out, and remember, utter idiots are not guaranteed three strikes. If you're an especially smelly ass, you might be out and ejected with your first rude comment.
6. We won't tolerate hate material.
We don't enjoy knocks on the door from the Secret Service, so we won't publish or tolerate "jokes" about killing the President (or anyone else), ambiguous calls for the people to rise up in violent revolution, etc. Yes, we're willing to be imprisoned or killed for the things we believe, but we're not eager to be imprisoned or killed ... for the things you believe.
7. We ask readers, please, to send no more than one email intended for publication daily. We cheerfully help readers toward this goal by publishing no more than one email per person daily.

8. If you send cut-and-pasted comments as if they're yours, or send other people's comments with no attribution and no hint they're not yours, this is called "plagiarism." It's tacky, and it'll get your future emails filtered directly into the trash.

9. Here's a rule you didn't expect: Please don't use the symbols "<" or ">" unless you're coding HTML (see below). Use ( and ) or [ and ] or { and } instead. Why? Because < and > are cornerstones of the code that builds web pages like ours. If you use "<" or ">" as text and we don't catch it and fix it, it'll almost certainly make what you've written look all wrong.

10.Yes, HTML may be included in your email, provided it's correct, and provided it's limited to the commands listed on our HTML page. Fixing your code doubles our work, so if you're coding, please make gosh-dang sure your coding is correct. We also ask nicely that HTMLers don't screw with our general styles, 'cuz screwing around makes the page confusing to readers. Our general format?
What you're saying appears in plain text, with occasional italics or bolding for emphasis

Lengthy quotes are usually indented. If you're quoting someone else from dialogue, it'll be in italics; if you're quoting from some other source, it will be in plain text.

Our responses appear in bold type.
Coding to generate graphics, animation, sound, or change font color or size, etc., is not allowed, and it'll get your email automatically deleted.
11. We love publishing feature-length articles, and we welcome yours. We prefer material that really grabs our attention, which means an opinion piece must say something a little out of the ordinary.

12. Life is short and our time is limited, so we won't even respond to writers who haven't read or followed these guidelines, whose facts aren't factual, who send eleven rewrites, who go shriekingly insane when someone politely disagrees, who won't communicate with us when there's a problem, won't allow their work to be edited in the slightest, or otherwise make themselves into ass-pains.
With only rare exceptions, the topics we're interested in do not include Area 51, Bilderbergers, the Council on Foreign Relations, details you don't really understand about the World Trade Center's collapse, eyeballs inside pyramids, flying saucers, "Holocaust revisionism," Illuminati, Rothchilds, Rockefellers, Skull & Bones phobia, space aliens who walk among us, technologies allegedly suppressed for decades or generations, Trilateralists, or your theories about who killed JFK.

Please bear in mind that your readers (beginning with me) have to get to work on time, so keep it brief, and get to the point.

What we will or won't publish is somewhat subjective, but if you're trying to meaningfully and not-too-longwindedly discuss something tangibly related to our general topics of freedom and/or current events, we'll almost certainly publish your comments.
13. Check your facts. Cordially, with all the affection in the world, facts are rather important, and our credibility is on the line with every article we publish. If the "facts" cited in your article are less than factual -- if you don't know the difference between millions and billions, or you refer to Canada as America's neighbor to the south -- we'll assume you're a little slow or just not trying very hard, and we don't publish articles by authors who are slow or not trying.
We don't enjoy knocks on the door from the Secret Service, so we won't publish or tolerate "jokes" about killing the President (or anyone else), ambiguous calls for the people to rise up in violent revolution, etc. Yes, we're willing to be imprisoned or killed for the things we believe, but we're not eager to be imprisoned or killed ... for the things you believe. If you violate this rule your email will be blocked, with no second chances.
14. Any article published by Unknown News is subject to editing for clarity, grammar, and style. Material should require a minimum of tinkering to be presentable:
• Like any reader, we're far more likely to take an article seriously if it's written and presented seriously. Please use standard spelling and grammar rules for American English.

• Please proofread your article before sending it. We recommend reading your article to yourself, out loud. If you don't spellcheck or proofread, and you send an article full of exactly the sort of mistakes these simple tasks catch, we will understand that you don't give a damn about your writing (or our time).

• Please use common, everyday English, not lots of insider jargon or gobbledygook. If complicated terms are necessary, define them in your article.

• The first time you mention someone, tell us who he/she is. For example, "Albright said ..." is wrong and confusing unless you've established that you're referring to Former Secretary of State Madeline Albright.

• Similarly, all unusual acronyms must be defined the first time they are used -- don't tell us about the FYWZGG without telling us what it is.

• We welcome criticisms of the world's so-called leaders, but prefer they be referred to by name, not by infantile insulting nicknames. The Vice President, for example, is Dick Cheney, not SuckMyDick Chainy. We don't refer to President Bush as Bushie-Gooshie-Between-the-Ears. This has nothing to do with "respecting" such leaders, as most deserve no respect at all, but it has everything to do with respecting our readers. Criticism requires thought; insults do not.

• We have fully functional funny bones, but we're usually in "serious mode" while working on the website ... so if you're sending something that's intended as satire, parody, or comedy, please don't assume we'll "get it." Tell us, flat out and up front, "This is satire."

• If you'd like to say a few or a few dozen words "about the author," please do. If you'd like your email address published, so readers can contact you, just let us know. Elsewise, we generally publish articles as "by first-name last-initial," with only our email address for feedback.
15. We reject all "multiple sublissions." We love and enjoy reading other weblogs and alternative publications, but we don't have any time or interest in duplicating their work. We also scratch our heads, wondering about authors who submit an article to several or dozens of weblogs. I understand the desire to see your work published and read, but I never have and never will understand this desire to see one's work published everywhere.
So if you're sending something that's already on-line somewhere else, or something you've submitted somewhere else, please send the URL, not the article.
16. If you're sending something that's date-sensitive -- a deep think-piece on Arbor Day, for example -- we suggest you send it at least a week before Arbor Day.

17. We rarely link to or publish petitions or "open letters" to politicians. It's a waste of time, since we don't believe the people addressed in such "open letters" will read them, or care.

18. Send original articles as plain, un-coded text, in the body of your email -- not as an attachment. Remember, our software automatically deletes all email with attachments.

A bit about the basics of journalism:
The bare-bones basics of journalism is: who, what, when, where, why and how. We're amateur journalists, but that doesn't have to mean half-assed, so if you're participating here, we do ask that you provide the basics.

If you're quoting someone, we'll need to know who.

If you're saying something, we'll need to know what.

If you're referencing a website, we'll need to know what website.

Et cetera. Whether intended as news, commentary, or dialogue, emails lacking the bare-bones minimums of journalism will be disregarded.

What this means is, we don't have time to interrogate emailers who play cryptic games, who allude to more information than they can reveal, or who otherwise don't or won't provide the simple basics.
A bit about bylines and pen names:
Authors "roll their own" bylines, and we don't keep records of who's who, so please tell us your desired nom de plume, each and every time.
A bit about personal chit-chat with the folks behind Unknown News:
Readers who raise thorny personal or philosophical questions but don't want their comments published will almost certainly get only a brief reply, if that. We're sorry, but we simply can't be electronic penpals. Our replies are usually brief.

When we receive especially compelling, heartfelt personal emails that require a long, heartfelt response, they go into our "urgent, must reply" file ... and we sincerely hope we'll get to them ... but we rarely do. Personal correspondence is not our strong suit.
A bit about copyrights:
Authors retain the copyright on their works. We hold only the right to on-line publication and -- someday, eventually -- an off-line "best of" collection for fundraising purposes.

Sometimes, love is not forever, but once you've sent something, you can't take it back. This means that if or when we write or publish or link to something that offends you, we're not obligated to take a day off work and promptly wipe the website, deleting each and every word you've ever sent, just because you demand it.
A bit about our disorganization:
Please don't send multi-part emails, serialized articles, or anything that won't make sense all by itself (without referring to background material sent separately). We're far too disorganized to keep track of more than one email at a time.
A bit about feedback:
Some of our readers and writers fear their government, as anyone who knows anything about government should. For this reason, we keep no records of who’s who or how to get in touch. We have no files to seize.

This puts some people's minds at ease, but it also means we can’t forward emails to our authors. So if you’d like to get in touch with one of our writers, or if you’ve written something we’ve published and you’d like to follow the feedback, the dialogue page is your best bet.
A bit about hate:
We won't tolerate hate material (i.e., all or most ____________s are lazy, sick, inferior, or deserve a lesser lot in life). And we'll be the judge of what's hate material.
A bit about hidden URLs:
We can't guess why, but some websites prefer to hide their internal URLs, or change their articles' URLs after a few days, or even a few hours. The Canadian news site "canoe" is a perfect example; most articles people find and send from "canoe" are long gone by the time we get your email.

If you've found a good article at a rapid-shuffling URL site, you must either figure out the super-secret, internal, long-lasting URL, or tell us plainly how you got to that internal page.

We really don't have time to play hide-and-seek, so if we can't find what you're quoting or referring to, and find it quickly, at the URL you've sent, we'll honor what seems to be such sites' intent, by not putting up a link.
A bit about how many is too many:
This website is our hobby and our passion, but we do not post everything anyone sends. We're not stenographers.

If you're sending more material than we use, you're probably sending too much.

If you're sending a parade of links that all lead back to one or two sources, that's just advertising.

If you're sending an extended series of commentaries about the excessive tow fees in Raymond, Missouri, please die.

We sometimes need to eat, sleep, and go to the bathroom, so we can only publish the items that interest or infuriate us most, or make us chuckle loudest.
A bit about investigative journalism:
If you have completed serious, credible investiagtive journalism, we'll cerrtainly consider publishing it.

Sadly, though, time precludes us from conducting in-depth investigative journalism about each and every atrocity known to humanity. There are lots, but we can't live our lives, prep and publish this website, do our real-world activism, and pretend we're investigative journalists.

We're Helen & Harry, not Woodward & Bernstein.
A bit about language:
Tragically, we are fluent in English, and no other language.

Some people are offended by naughty words, such as fucking asshole or dicklicking shithead. We're not easily offended, and we consider such words part of the poetry of the American language.
A bit about length limits:
We don't have length limits, because when you need 10,000 words, you need 10,000 words. Generally, though, briefer is better, and more people will read a few hundred words than a few thousand.

Also, please remember that we're not your employees: The longer your submission, the longer it will take me to prep and code it. At some unpredictable point, if what you're written isn't excellent enough to justify my extra time and work, submissions may be delayed or discarded.
A bit about quality and quantity:
If you're sending several link suggestions, please send them all in one big email, instead of several little ones. Quality trumps quantity, though. If you're sending more than 3-4 link suggestions daily, unless we're using virtually everything you send you're probably sending too many, or too many reruns.

If you're unsure what we're looking for, don't be shy about asking.
A bit about the reality of running this website:
We don’t publish everything we write or find, so we can’t promise to publish everything you write or find. We’re low-level worker-drones doing the website in our spare time, and time is limited.

We receive literally dozens, sometimes hundreds of link suggestions daily, and we're always in a rush, so if you're sending an article that's subtle, or requires a reader's slow, thoughtful rumination, we probably won't "get it" unless you write a paragraph or two yourself, and explain why this article is worthwhile.

For example, a link to an article headlined "Gummi bear sales projected to decline" is a link we probably won't follow to an article we probably won't read unless your email tells us why we should.

Similarly, if you're sending a link to something long or complicated -- the complete text of a legal document, a Congressional bill, transcripts of an obscure subcommittee's hearings, etc. -- please summarize it in your email, or tell us why you're sending it, or we might miss the significance of Section 14, subsection B, Item 17.
A bit about rewrites and 'change-of-hearts':
Folks unfamiliar with the work of web-coding sometimes think it's an instantaneous process, as easy as cut-and-paste. It's not. HTML coding can be a little tedious, and we do it by hand, with no prep-aid software. It can take half an hour (or longer) for us to proofread, edit, prep, and HTML-code an average, uncomplicated article for publication. And we're happy to do it, but please don't ask us to do this work twice. If you send rewrites or have a change-of-heart and ask us not to publish something after we've prepped it, you're taking large chunks of our time and flushing that time down the toilet.

Of course, we understand that these things will happen, but if these things happen repeatedly with the same author, we're likely to ... remember the source.

We reiterate: Please don't send what you've written until you're done writing it.
A bit about sites we won't link to:
We won't link to nutball sites. This includes:

• sites with permanent pictures of space aliens on their main page, or prominent illustrations of an eyeball in a pyramid

• sites with names like TinFoilHat, or my-dentures-pick-up-shortwave-broadcasts.com

• sites where a recurring theme is the Illuminati, the Bilderbergs, how the planets control our lives, the Trilateral Commission, the wit and wisdom of Lyndon LaRouche, or anything else which falls beyond the realm of things which make sense

• sites where the agenda is offensive, or where we can smell an agenda but we can't quickly figure out what it is, or where we get a gut feeling they're bonkers

• sites where the layout or lack-of-proofreading debunks the text

• sites that seem less than credible for any reason.

Even if it looks genuine, we will not present news from sources that induce snickering. No exceptions.

And your credibility is on the line, too. Once you've sent us "news" that Drew Barrymore shot JFK, it's unlikely we'll take your next suggestions seriously.

We won't knowingly link to websites that spam us. And you bet your ass, that specifically includes weblogs that add us to their daily mailing list without asking us.

We won't knowingly link to websites that do automatic downloads, publish ads designed to look like internal warning messages about your computer, disable the 'back' function, try to reset your home page, or do any such dirty tricks.

Sorry, we can't link to 'Geocities' or other sites which allow free web space but severely constrain the number of visitors allowed, because ten minutes after we put up the link, the bandwidth limit is exceeded and further connections are blocked for the day.

We won't knowingly link to websites that publish hate material.

We won't link to articles in Arab News detailing how bad Jews are, or articles in Jewish News detailing how bad Arabs are, or etc. Everyone's entitled to hate to their heart's content, but we're not interested. Booooring.

We won't link to "think tanks" or advocacy sites designed for "true believers." There's nothing unexpected at i-love-guns.com or guns-are-bad.com; you know what the article's going to say as soon as you see the web address.

If any of this crap slips by us, please do let us know.
A bit about wingnuts:
The time we give the website is huge but never as much as we wish it could be. For this reason, we're impatient with wingnuts -- an old-school term for the deluded and dingbatty.

If you send "link suggestions" to deluded or dingbatty sites (the Martians are coming, RFK shot JFK, racial or religious or ethnic or gender supremacists, advice straight from God, etc.), with notes suggesting that you take such stuff seriously, we'll never take you seriously again.
   
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DISCLAIMER FOR DUMMIES  

Our front page is free from nudity and profanity, but interior pages and external links may not be safe for work, and you may be shocked, offended, or in trouble with your boss. A link doesn't imply that we agree with every sentence and every sentiment on every site we link to. We use our noggins, and suggest you use yours.

Anything sent to Unknown News
may be published. If you don't want
   it published, say so plainly. Of course,
   we publish all incoming hate mail.
Unknown News is more fun and more informative with your participation, so please don't be shy. Consider yourself invited to speak your mind.

You can contact Helen & Harry at <unknownnews at inbox.com>. If that address ever fails, check our contact page for our alternate email addresses.

but We always welcome dialogue for publication, and we're especially interested in hearing and considering different perspectives. All we ask is that you conduct yourself sanely and civilly. For the most productive dialogue, it helps if you'll cite the specific article or concept we've gotten wrong.

But please, don't email us unless you're really and truly, honestly, actually trying to send a communication you're not sending to anyone or everyone else.

When we publish incoming emails, we usually edit out the sender's last name, email address, or anything else that would tend to uniquely identify the author (if we slip up, please let us know). But if your email is unambiguously intended only to annoy, insult, or threaten us, we'll publish all the details, and leave it on-line forever.

 

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    Internet Explorer.

Mozilla's Firefox is better,
much better -- and free.

  With Mozilla Firefox and a few free add-
  ons, you can block animated ads, pop-ups,
  pop-unders, and other annoyances, add
  some conveniences you've only dreamed
  of, and actually enjoy your on-line time.

  An un-paid and enthusiastic endorsement
from Helen & Harry at Unknown News